Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Miss Darling's Two Weeks Notice

Everyone warned me.
"Exes are exes for a reason. I'd watch your ass, if I were you."
But I paid them no never mind
she was so convincing.
The gal said all the right things
told me exactly what I wanted to hear.
That in our eleven months apart
she realized just how much I mean to her
and if I gave her another chance
she's never do anything to hurt me again.
You see, before
last time
I caught her going behind my back
having secret conversations with another man
something she swore, she would never do.
But I'm a nice guy
I believed her this time
said, we'd get a place of our own
where she could paint
and I could type my stories.
It'd be better this time.
We'd do it right.
Because she knew what it was like to not have me
and never wanted to go through that again.
Within three months of her being back
it all unraveled.
So quick and so fast
just like last time.
First she got onto my Facebook
deleted a bunch of girls from my friends list
went through my journal
got into my phone
deleted pictures of girls I dated after we broke up.
So I said,
"Okay. If that's how it's gonna be, then delete all the pictures of your exes."
"Alright, I will."
The next day she came up to me,
"See..." holding up her phone showing me that they were gone.
"....they're gone." She said, with a smile. Then she kissed me.
"Are you sure you got rid of them? You didn't just e-mail them to yourself and then delete them?"
"Geez. What kind of person do you think I am. I know this is my last chance. I wouldn't do that."
"Okay."
"I love you baby." She tried to kiss me again, this time I put my hand up.
"Wait....so then open your e-mail. Just open it and let me see that you didn't save em'?"
Deer in the headlights look
her words began to stutter.
"Well....I---"
And sure as shit they were there. Just like I thought.
It just scared the fuck out of me
how easily, how naturally, and convincingly she could lie to me.
I told her that if she were any other chick, she'd be packing her bags
but she was my dream woman
the only one I ever really wanted.
So I promised to forgive her and try to move forward.
That became an impossible promise to keep.
When every week
new lies came out of the dark and into the light.
My started to turn from black to red
love to hate.
Every time she opened her mouth
everything that she said
a little voice in the back of mind cried,
BULLSHIT!
But it's put me in a helluva spot here.
We just bought a trailer together.
Barely been living here a week.
No heat, no running water, no carpet.
It's been so fucking cold here
we've been miserable.
Wrapping up in an electric blanket
a floor heater not doing shit.
We talked about it and we thought, we'd give it one last shotthat she'd go see a shrink and we'd work on it.
But the other night it just hit me
the truth, that is
like a smack in the face.
It stung so bad
I didn't want to believe it
but I knew, I couldn't deny it.
I was sitting here in the trailer
smoking
writing
listening to some music.
When I heard her car pull up.
And I thought, 'Shit, she's home.'
Right then, I knew.
We were done.
The gal is like two different people
one treats me better than any woman ever has
and the other took a dump in my heart.
I've never loved and hated someone before
so that's making this a real bitch to deal with.
But I'll be fine. I know I will.
I'm just so pissed off at her
for ruining everything
for pissing it all away.
We could've done so much together
made such a good life
had great times
grown old together
all that shit
and now it's all over.
She asked me if she could at least put in her two weeks notice at work
before moving her shit
back to her parents house in Tucson.
I said, that was fine.
And now we've got two weeks to
sit on this couch together
freezing our asses off
watching Ru Paul's Drag Race
pretending everything is okay
even though we know this is the end.
But you know,
because she did put in her two weeks notice
I guess, I'll give her a good reference
if anyone calls about her.

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