The Bike Thief in the Hot Pink Thong

Fifth grade
outside there as a little amphitheater area
a large concrete stage with rows of stairs
a grassy spot for us kids to sit on.
The principle was up there
talking about something.
To the right of the stage
were the racks where everyone kept their bicycles.
During the principle's speech
a small man ran up to the bike racks
in a belly shirt
dirty white sneakers with big, hot pink, laces
and a hot pink thong to match.
His bare ass
jiggling and bouncing
as he hopped on one of the unlocked bikes
and started to peddle away on it.
I remember
all the kids
half of us screaming
half of us laughing
the guy's big frizzy brown hair
and his ass in that thong
had me and my buddies in stitches with laughter.
He didn't get too far
our P.E. teacher
tackled him off the bike and onto the concrete.
The principle left the podium
and helped restrain him
until the security guard got there.
Then the principle put the bike gently back in the rack
and then continued his speech.
"Sorry about that children."
But I wasn't listening
just wondering
why in the hell
Richard Simmons had come to our school
and tired to steal a little girl's bike.

White Eyes & The Vibrating Hips

They had found each other in the online personal ads.
Molly had a room for rent in her two bedroom condo.
Wyatt and his girlfriend were having some trouble
so they were gonna try having some space.
Molly, the lady with the room for rent,
She didn’t tell Wyatt what she was until after he had already moved in.
Kinetics 8, was her make and model
The most advanced cybernetic humanoid on Earth.
She was originally created to work in San Francisco’s red light district.
One of her weekly regulars was a professor at the University.
He was completely enthralled with Molly
Wondered just how intelligent she really was
So when he went to visit her
It became less about his weekly blow job
And more about what equations she could solve.
She really enjoyed it too
In fact, numbers became an obsession for her
It’s all she thought about.
He wanted more for her than the life she was living
She was capable of so much more
He had told her.
Molly ran away the night Hurricane Jessica was pounding the Bay area.
The professor and a friend of his removed pleasure bot as her primary programming function
Except for normal, human, sexual interaction.
He uploaded a new program of his own design
A program with one central focus,
The ability to learn.
She was able to pass the National Bank Teller Exam.
He helped her get setup into her own place
Thinking of her as the daughter he didn’t have
The daughter he had lost
All those years ago.
When Molly finally told Wyatt what she was
He took it quite well.
The nanny for Wyatt’s family had been a Kinetics 4
He had even voted for the Robot Rights Initiative in the past fall
So rooming with a bot seemed exciting to him.
When his girlfriend finally called it quits for good,
Molly was there to listen to him, to console him, the best she could.
“It’ll be alright. What’s the saying? How does it go?”
He stared at her blankly
As he eyes shook back and forth, almost vibrating,
Like they did when she was scanning her CPU, in deep thought.
"Ah, yes. There's plenty of fish in the sea. Earth is a big place Wyatt. There are still over six billion other females with which you can form a relationship with. So there's really no reason to be upset."
"I know, Molly. If only it were that simple."
"But it is that simple."
"This is something that might be hard for you...understand. But I don't care about the other six billion or whatever women. She was the one."
"I think, I understand what you're saying. There may be six billion other women, but she was the one that your heart desired."
"Yes. Exactly."
"I'm sorry, Wyatt. I'm sorry you're feeling this way."
"Thanks."
"Do you want to know something?"
He nodded at her, as if to say, what?
"Generally speaking, after a man get his heart broken, like you have...usually after he's had sex with a new female, much of those sad feelings go away."
"Yeah, but that's just the thing! I have no desire to seek out someone new. Go through that awkward, getting to know you bullshit. I just don't feel up to it."
"What about a female that you're already familiar with? Someone you know. I've heard people at work call it a 'fuck buddy'."
Wyatt laughed, pouring himself another double.
"Molly, you're the only girl I know."
"Well?" She asked, with her eyebrow raised, scooting herself over slowly. Like a conveyor belt, just slowly, so slowly, you couldn't even see her move. But she's was on her way.
"What? You and I? Hahaha! I don't think that'd be such a good idea."
It was then that she made an expression he had never seen on her face before. She was embarrassed.
Her cheeks flush with red and her brow shifted down.
"Why, not?"
"Well...I had sex with a bot once and I didn't like it."
She stared at him a good long while
in uncomfortable
strangling silence.
"Wyatt. You've never lied to me before just now. Why? I can read your expressions, I can feel your accelerated heart rate. What is it really?"
"I just...I just heard that you bots vibrate and your eyes roll over white when you orgasm. I don't know. My buddy said he did it and it really freaked him out."
"Do you only do what your friends like? Or are you a man that experiences the things that he wants?"
Another raised eyebrow, this time with a smile. The kind where she bit her lip.
He felt as though his very manhood was being challenged
by a bot, no less.
So he had to
she left him with no other choice.
He took her chin and brought her mouth to his
and kissed her. Softly, but she put her hand on the back of his head
pulling him tight
her fingers digging deep into his brown hair.
Molly put her tongue into his mouth
her CPU taking a moment to adapt to his kissing style.
He slipped his hand down the plunging neckline of her blouse
grabbing a firm handful.
"So this isn't going to change anything is it?" He asked, a look of worry all over his face.
"You mean, am I going to require a committed relationship after tonight? No. I'm just trying to be a good friend and make you feel better."
They kept kissing
removing their clothing
breathing heavily
when he touched her, underneath her panties
she was wet.
He could feel it slowly trickling out of her.
She didn't waste any time in getting on top of him
grabbing his dick
and slowly sliding down onto it
pushing her hips downward
until she could go no further.
Her vagina automatically adjusting it's size
to fit him best and optimize pleasure for both of them.
Molly shifted herself so that his dick
was gliding right over her g-spot
at just that right angle.
And then together they got into a rhythm.
The sex beat.
Riding atop of him
the two of them kissing
and grinding away
getting there
like going up a rollercoaster
waiting for the drop.
Her body sensors told her that
he was close to climaxing.
Molly synced up with him
got right to where he was
so they could cum at the same time
together.
Her hips shifting back and forth
Wyatt didn't know it
wasn't thinking about it
but those weren't bones and muscles
shaking those fleshy hips back and forth
it was wire, microchips, pistons and gears.
The head of his dick rubbing over her pleasure spot
again
again
and again.
Back and forth on that concentrated spot.
That's when she began to vibrate
starting in her vagina
sending out pulse waves
that radiated
to the tips of her fingers and her toes
through her whole body.
And just like his friend had said,
at that crucial moment
before they both blew their loads
Molly's eyes rolled over white
into the back of her head.
But it didn't creep him out
like he thought it would.
Fuck no.
In fact,
it was the greatest orgasm
he had ever had.
And that was
just one of those things
that you gotta try for yourself.