The Recluse Shines

Every day is exactly the same.
I wake up around 6:30 a.m.
get in the tub
read the latest horrific news
about the pandemic
and how it's still continuing
to rapidly spread across the world
while we all sit in isolation, under quarantine.
My home country of The United States
became number one in infections
as of yesterday.
USA NUMBER ONE!
I read about all that and get out of the steaming hot bath.
I smoke a bowl of weed and rub one out real quick.
Then I make my bed and watch something on T.V.
from one of my handful of streaming subscriptions.
Around noon
I get anxious and start wanting a drink.
Around four or five in the afternoon
I'll finally walk up to the corner store
and get whatever booze I want for the night.
Either Miller High Life or White Claws.
I come home
walking past my Mother with my black plastic bag
of whatever cans I got.
Ever since this virus shit started
she's stopped complaining about my drinking so much.
I go to my room.
Drink.
Smoke.
Play video games.
Completely try to escape my own mind.
It's all I can do to not completely go crazy.
Once I'm cross-faded enough
and I got a good buzz going strong
then I'll do one of three things:
1. Take a book outside, smoke cigarettes, and read.
2. Sit outside, smoke cigarettes, and play either Jeopardy or 8-Ball Billiards on my phone.
3. Take the typewriter outside, smoke cigarettes, and write something like this.
Tonight, I was lucky.
Tonight I got number 3.
Tomorrow, it starts all over again.
A daily game show
where no one ever really wins
but at it's best
I get door number 3
and am rewarded with a few good lines.
Honestly, I can't complain.
Because 

under this world-wide quarantine
the recluse shines

brightly.

Paid Leave

Ever since the Coronavirus hit

and became a major threat to public health

I've been calling out sick from work.

It's a pretty cushy job with

The U.S. Census Bureau

in a giant call center in Tempe.

But somehow, the very idea

of sitting in giant room

with 200 plus 

people seated in cubicals 

all packed together

breathing the same recycled air

for eight hours a day

seemed like a quick way to get infected.

And as of recently,

I've been staying with my Mother

who has a compromised immune system

and would most likely die, if she caught it.

So for the past five days

I've called in sick to work.

Well, today was payday

my first check and I desperately needed it.

Penny in HR told me, that checks would be distributed outside the building.

I got there 

in blue latex gloves and medical face mask

and there was no one outside, no checks being passed out.

Reluctantly, I went inside and whattya know

they're passing out checks in the 

motherfuckin' break room.

A long line of people

snaking all around the room and down the hall.

Nearly 200 people, standing shoulder to shoulder

all waiting to sign for their paycheck.

I stood in line

for maybe 8 minutes or so

getting stares from people

that weren't wearing gloves or a face mask.

A young black kid with dreads, said,

"Shit ain't that bad man. It's just the media."

I laughed under my blue mask

"Oh yeah? Hey, tell that to Italy and they're 4,000 dead. They don't even got room for all the dead bodies over there!"

I remembered, Penny from HR and said, fuck it.

I walked down the hall and into HR.

"Will you please get my check?"

Penny jumped up from her desk.

"Oh! Of course, I'm so sorry! Give me just a minute..."

Penny said, taking my driver's license from my already outstretched hand.

"You can wait in my office, if you like." She said, warmly.

"Thank you, but I think, it'll be best if I just don't touch anything." 

"Good point!"

And we both laughed nervously.

Two minutes later and she was back with my check.

"There you go and again, I am so sorry about that, Mr. Valdez."

"Thank you. I thought checks were going to be given outside?"

"Well, that's what I wanted to do, but...I was vetoed."

Penny said, with a defeated tone. I felt bad for her.

She seemed like a genuine and good person.

I walked out of there

knowing damn well

that I'd never set foot in that building ever again.

One week later

and they shut down the call center.

'Closed for disinfecting, until further notice'

There's a lot of rumors out there

that President Trump 

will declare martial law

and a complete lock down

before the end of the week.

Or maybe he won't.

Who fucking knows?

Each morning

I awaken to the horrors of

this ever changing world

with this ever worsening virus

all this bad news

brought to me

by the innocent blue glow

of my goddamn cellphone.

What a world.

A Night At The Starlight Motel, A Fling Before Quarantine

The virus pandemic was getting out of control

states were starting to go on lock down

complete quarantine.

An ex-girlfriend of mine from a few years back

we had been going back and forth, 

in the past few weeks

saying we should get a drink and catch up, 

but we still hadn't.

So I texted her,

'Hey we should really get that drink before we're all quarantined.'

'Yes, we definitely should. Have you ever stayed at the Starlite Motel?'

She was talking about the seedy little motel

off Main Street

the one with the flashing neon diving lady sign.

The unofficial icon & symbol

of our little city, Mesa.

'No, I never have. Always wanted to though.'

'Well, we should just do that then. Get some beers, get a room, hangout. Sounds better than just going to some bar.'

'Fuck yeah, let's do it. I'm down.'

We agreed to meet at 7 o'clock.

I drove down the street, one block over from the motel,

and even from there, one street over and behind

I could see the diving lady sign

the neon woman diving

in three flashes

down into the blue neon water splash

at the bottom.

I pulled up in my little red truck

just as Ashton was putting the key card into the door.

The sun was quickly setting in the West.

the diving lady glowing brightly

against the pink-blue smeared sky.

"Hey there." She said, standing in the open doorway

smiling up at me from her pale face

her pitch black hair resting on her black leather jacket

black shirt, skirt, fishnets, boots.

She was the dark queen.

Gothic Drew Barrymore is a really good way

to describe Ashton.

"Hey." I said, giving her a tight hug.

I set my backpack down.

"I brought a jukebox. It's basically just a giant bluetooth speaker, it's like four feet tall."

"Oh, cool!"

I lugged the big jukebox speaker in and plugged it into the wall.

It connected to my phone

flashing blue, green, red, and yellow lights

now pulsated from the jukebox.

She had a 12 pack of Truly hard seltzer and a 12 pack of Miller High Life

I had a weed vape pen and a pack of Pall Mall reds.

We sat in the two chairs at the medium-sized circular wood table

starting slamming back our drinks

and got to catching up on things.

Mostly, her filling me in as to why

her and her long-term boyfriend were currently

on a break and most likely, not getting back together.

She told me tales of him destroying hotel rooms

in small European towns

and how shocked she was, that the cops just let him go.

"American cops would've just fucking shot him! But they wouldn't even arrest him!"

She told me about how he had tried to control her

didn't want her going out

didn't want her hanging out with friends

didn't want her drinking.

I just sat there shaking my head

smiling and laughing.

Unbelievable.

In all the time that I had dated Ashton

I had NEVER even thought about trying to

tame her.

A woman like that

you can't.

You'd just be shoveling water against the tide.

She's one of those wild and tough broads

that you can't try to cage up

I mean some guys like him would try

but me?

Shit, I don't believe in birds living in cages either.

'She's beautiful.' I thought, staring at her, as I changed the subject

to our most favorite subject to discuss;

music.

Ashton knew her shit.

This gal knew just as much about Blues music as I did

and THEN some.

She had been responsible for introducing me to some of the underground greats.

So we got into it.

Females Blues Singers.

Bukka White.

Blind Willie McTell.

It was great. Just like old times, the good ones.

I smoked more cigarettes and we kept on drinking.

The conversation flowed

just like the drinks down our throats.

I had forgotten just how much

I truly LOVED this woman's company

and conversation.

We finished all the hard seltzers and then started

in on those Miler High Life's.

I switched the music to 1940's slow jams

'Moonlight Serenade' by Glenn Miller.

We stood up and slowly danced together

swaying back and forth

the warmth of her body heat

so close I could feel it.

I put my hand under her chin and brought her lips to mine.

Like two pads of hot butter

we just melted onto the bed, wrapped up in each other's arms.

We kissed long and hard

breathing heavily through our noses

she started making those little whimpering noises that she made.

"No, no, we can't...I can't fuck you tonight...I can't..."

She moaned again, whispering my name,

and another little whimper escaped her lips.

I gripped a good handful of her thick, black hair

pulled it into a tight fist

and pressed my mouth to her neck

lightly biting and then kissing all the way up

her neck.

I whispered into her ear, trying not to laugh at what I was about to say,

"You're not fucking me tonight, I'm fucking you."

I lifted up her top and her big, pale, pink tits bounced out.

I slipped it in

and both of us gasped, kissing hard.

Remembering just how good it felt

when we got together like this

every few years or so.

We gasped

and we smiled

we laughed

and we kissed again.

Both of us just going at it

while the world around us

was getting

cancelled

postponed

closed

quarantined

and all the while

that neon lady sign

continued diving

down, down, down,

splash.

The New American Dream

Everyone has been self-isolating for about four days now.

In an effort to combat the spread of the Coronavirus.

Tonight, the Governor announced

that the Army was being deployed

rumors are running wild that we'll be on lock down/quarantine

before the weekend is over.

California's 40 million residents have just been placed

under mandatory

lock down

quarantine

for the next month.

Other states are expected to follow

as the disease continues to spread

daily.

Italy has so many dead bodies

they've run out of room

for them.

Army trucks having to transport the dead to

the ovens.

Page after page

of obituaries in the Italian newspapers.

And experts say, The United States

is just two weeks behind Italy

and our numbers of

infections and deaths are progressing

at the same rate.

Not hard to see what comes next.

So I drink these beers

smoke a bit of reefer

hitting these keys

and listening to

the new playlist I just made,

'Songs to Quarantine To;.

The first song is 'Solitude' by Duke Ellington

and from now on, it will always remind me

of this time.

All I can do is type these words

get a good buzz going

stay the fuck away from people

and hope

for a somewhat happy ending 

to all of this.

The New American Dream;

don't die.

Day One

I've never seen anything like it in all my life.

It's fucking terrifying how fast everything

happened.

As of tonight, all bars & restaurants are to close at 8 p.m.

and stay closed, until further notice

in an effort to help slow down the infection rate.

It's what other countries are doing.

Spain, Italy, and France are already on complete

lock down/quarantine.

So it's only a matter of time

until ole' Uncle Sam tell us all

to go to our rooms

we're fucking grounded

for the greater good.

Honestly, I'm kinda okay with it.

I think this might be good for society,

the world,

but Americans, especially.

Let everybody sit between the four walls

get a real good look at themselves

think about what's truly important and valuable in this life

and maybe

just maybe

humanity will wake the fuck up

and start living right.

But then again,

that's asking a lot.

I honestly don't know

if we got it left in us.

I hope that we do.

This was day one.

Sex & Chowder

I was in town for exactly
four days and four nights.
That first day
we made love
two times before leaving the house
cooked up a nice little breakfast scramble for us both.
We watched Jeopardy
and she got a lady boner
watching me get most of the questions right.
She was a college educated, woman
I was a high school dropout, self-taught & streetwise, little fucker.
So I'm sure that was a bit of a surprise.
We hit the road for
Astoria on the Oregon coast.
Filming location of 'Kindergarten Cop' & 'Goonies'
I thought, in my vidiot brain.
We drove through the rain
my head turning at all the sights
the green was everywhere I looked
and I wanted to soak up as much as I possibly could.
So I kept looking out the window
sparking up joints & cigarettes
passing a lit Parliament to Katie, who was driving.
"Thanks baby." She said,
squeezing my hand
that lay in her lap.
We listened to a play list that we both shared
playing all of our songs
the soundtrack to this long distance love.
When we pulled into town
Katie immediately pointed to a large hill
just to our left
"That's the school from 'Kindergarten Cop'."
"Oh cool."
Arnold's voice echoed inside my head, "It's not a tumor..."
We parked the car and found the place we were going to eat.
A seafood place, that had a big glass panel
in the floor
where one could observe sea lions
resting on some wooden planks below
thankful to be given refuge from
the Great White Sharks
that lay in wait for them
just beyond the edge of the safety of shore.
I was also feeling like I had been given
some kind of reprieve
a little break
from my lonely, day to day life, back in Phoenix.
We took our seats at the table and browsed through the menu.
On the way up there
Katie had mentioned how much she
loved sauerkraut
and I admitted to never eating it before.
So when I looked at the menu
I saw that they had a bratwurst with sauerkraut on it
so I ordered it.
Along with a cup of their fresh clam chowder.
"You like clam chowder?" Katie asked, after the server walked away.
"I don't know. Never tried it before, actually. I figured since, I'm already trying one new thing, then why not try another?"
We got a 'flight' of beers
the little wooden thing with the little glasses
we quickly sorted out which ones
I liked
and which ones
I didn't.
Katie ended up taking most of the IPA's
the real 'hoppy' beers.
My favorite beer is Old Style
so I mainly just stuck to the lagers.
When that cup of clam chowder came to the table
I tell you what
it was so good
Katie took a video of me with her phone
savoring bite after bite
of that seafood deliciousness.
The brat had too many mustard seeds on it though
and the sauerkraut wasn't all that great to me.
Had me wishing I had gotten an entire bowl of that chowder.
Even just thinking about it now, makes me wish I had some more.
We got drinks at a bar down the street
at a place called Inferno Lounge
that overlooked the little bay
perfect view of the ships and the water.
We sipped our drinks
watched little tugboats go on by
seeing sea lions breaching and swimming all around.
The bar was playing every good Lowrider Oldies jam
known to man.
'Try Me' by James Brown
'Angel Baby' by Rosie & The Originals
'Tell It Like It Is' by Aaron Neville
'Kiss & Say Goodbye' by The Manhattans.
All the jams a vato loves.
The massive ships in the bay
holding hundreds of shipping containers
we couldn't tell if the ships were moving or not.
"I swear, that one is in a different position than it was five minutes ago."
"Yeah, I'm pretty sure they're moving honey."
We took pictures on the boardwalk
smiling
huggin' & kissin'
just so goddamn happy
to be there
together.
We got back in the car and started driving again
for a moment, I forgot what we were doing altogether
and before I knew it
at the end of the long road
we were driving down
I saw the ocean.
It had been years since I'd seen it.
Endless & infinite.
Katie took a hard left and raced down the beach
other cars dotting the landscape all around us.
She flew down the sand
leaving all other vehicles behind us
stopping at a nice deserted spot.
We both got out
and walked toward the ocean waves
curling big, violent, and white,
off in the distance.
The salty ocean air in our noses
the chilly breeze tickling our faces.
I wrapped my arms around Katie's waist
and lightly kissed the back of her neck.
A car pulled up next to us and just sat there
so we got back in and drove as far away
as we possibly could.
As soon as we parked
we began kissing
hard & passionate,
breathing through our noses.
"You wanna get in the backseat?" She asked.
"How about on the hood of the car?" I shot back.
"No....backseat." She gasped, in-between kisses.
I broke away from the kiss
and got in the backseat.
Katie pulled her pants down
to her knees.
I got it in
and we worked it real good.
Both of us, looking up every few seconds
making sure a car wasn't coming.
But there weren't any cars coming
the only thing coming that day
was us.
We both finished in record time
and kissed hard afterwards.
"I fuckin' love you." I said, trying to catch my breath.
"I love you."
I got out of the car
and popped my long-sleeve 'Bathory' shirt off
it was chilly outside
but I was burning up
that really hit the spot.
I stood shirtless
facing the ocean
the white waves
curling on the horizon.
Breathing what felt like fire
my heart racing a mile a minute.
She walked up behind me
wrapped her arms around my chest
and kissed the side of my neck.
I took her hand in mine and held it tight.
We shared a silence together
for a moment
watching the waves crash
far off on the horizon.
Staring at the great big world
that lay ahead of us
all the while
our little world
of our own creation
sitting right there
in the palms of our hands.

It Happens Everyday

Waiting in the chair directly next

to the front door

of a hair salon.

My son wants his hair cut like John Connor from the movie, 'Terminator 2'.

He doesn't think a barber will do it 

so I brought him here.

I see this old man

like seventy or eighty years old

white guy with hardly any hair at all

holding a mirror in his hand

bitching about something

there was no mistaking that tone in his voice.

A young woman with purple & pink hair

cut in a short bob

trimmed a couple more spots and then

he was done

and at the register directly in front of me

paying with a debit card.

"...and right here, is where you can leave a tip."

she said, pointing.

"No, no, no, I won't be doing that today." He said, waving her off.

"Let me see how I like the haircut first and then maybe next time, a tip.

Also, write down the days you're working."

He didn't ask

he didn't say, 'If you don't mind, could you...'

he just instructed her

and that bugged me.

Then I heard him say,

"How do you think those nails would look...in my hands?"

I looked up

saw her long, blue, nails

and the look on her face

cringing

her skin crawling

as she just had to stand there

waiting for the debit card receipt to print out

once it did, she threw up a fake smile and said,

"Have a good day, sir!"

Then she turned around and went back to clean up her station.

Old man turned for the door and found my eyes burning into him.

I motioned with my two fingers for him to come to me.

Now I was the one giving orders.

When I knew, I had his attention, I said,

"Next time, don't be such a creep."

"HUH?" The old bastard couldn't hear me

and so, he leaned in, even closer

so I repeated it again

at a much louder volume this time

so the entire salon could hear.

"NEXT TIME, DON'T BE SUCH A FUCKING CREEP."

His face turned into a sour expression.

"Well, I'm sorry if that's how you choose to interpret it..."

"It's not a matter of interpretation, it's reality. You're a fucking creep."

He stood there dumbfounded

he began to say the same phrase again

so I just cut him off, in mid-sentence,

"Just get the fuck outta here. Go on. Get the fuck out."

The old man's face went red & he clenched his fist

as he swung the door open

and got the fuck out.

The same lady cut my son's hair

and did a good job too

looked just like the kid from Terminator 2, in fact.

As I was paying for the haircut

and giving her a decent tip

I apologized about that dickhead earlier

she just shrugged and said,

"Oh thank you, but honestly, it's not a big deal. It happens every day."

"Well, it shouldn't."

As my son and I were walking out

into the parking lot

her words echoed in my head

like a ringing gong;

It happens

every

day.